Alan Moore's tribute to Jack Kirby, published in Wizard #33.
Saturday, December 26, 2015
Monday, December 14, 2015
X-MEN: The Pizza Hut Days
Clips from the X-Men roundtable interview, featuring Stan Lee, Bob Harras, Scott Lobdell, and Fabian Nicieza:
Also, the original commercial that ran with Pizza Hut's X-Men promotion:
Also, the original commercial that ran with Pizza Hut's X-Men promotion:
Monday, December 7, 2015
Micro-Reviews: HELLBLAZER, Part Three
Delano's AIDS talk in the opening is far more blunt than anything that would likely be published today.
The dialogue also makes it clear that even though John has a gay friend, they were never a couple. Guess that was something Delano felt the need to establish back then.
The hints that John’s bi don’t show up until years later, correct? He seems hostile to even the concept of homosexuality here.
John’s other friend, Ritchie, who I think was in the show, debuts here.
He uses magic (and psychedelics) to travel inside the mystery world of…computers.
Becoming one with the bytes enables him to track the movements of the evil fundamentalist group --which turns out, includes Zed’s father.
Didn’t the series end on a cliffhanger, never revealing what exactly Zed’s father wanted with her?
HELLBLAZER #8 - If that isn’t the boilerplate early Vertigo cover, then nothing is.
John Costanza, DC’s favorite 80s letterer, debuts this issue. Series automatically looks more American.
Also, the great Alfredo Alcala is doing finishes now, mainstreaming the book even more.
The asylum setting this issue inspired the TV show’s pilot. Pilot also picked up on the Newcastle backstory.
The pilot’s setup was great; a mysterious event in Newcastle has driven John to the brink.
He’s in an asylum, possibly insane. Brought out of retirement for a major case.
http://constantine.wikia.com/wiki/Non_Est_Asylum
Then the show proceeded to do formulaic demon-of-the-week plots -- with the occasional nod towards John’s callous pragmatism.
So, it turns out the fundamentalist group really is working for God -- and Zed is destined to be their Mary, giving birth to a new Christ.
Constantine agrees to work with a demon to stop the child’s birth, because he’s unwilling to tip the scales in Heaven’s favor.
For some reason, this never made it to network television.
HELLBLAZER #9 - The story of Constantine’s 35th birthday.
The first major storyline of the series is resolved by Constantine making love to Zed -- infecting her body with demon blood, thus preventing an angel from impregnating her.
I’m reminded of Steven Grant questioning why so many atheist Vertigo writers still draw upon Christian mythology in their stories. Delano is fulfilling the cliché before Vertigo even officially exists.
Delano’s actually set up the resolution quite well over the issues. The ending isn’t a cheat, but it is unexpected.
Zed, however, remains very poorly defined. I daresay I liked her TV incarnation better than anything I’ve read so far. If published today, the “problematic gender issues” would surely receive a few days of internet scorn.
“Oi! I gave that bird an injection o’ the ol’ demonseed. Problem solved! Time for me SWAMP THING crossover!”
I assume the National Health Service was in trouble in the late 80s. This is Delano’s third reference to its problems.
SWAMP THING #76 - Wasn’t expecting a Funky Flashman appearance this issue…
The SWAMP THING crossover is based on Swamp Thing stealing Constantine’s body in order to impregnate his girlfriend. Abby questions if Swamp Thing should get tested for AIDS, since Constantine is a known ladies’ man.
Why Swamp Thing has chosen Constantine’s body is barely explained -- a “synchronicity storm.” Swamp Thing also seems blasé about the demon blood he’s about to infect Abby with.
DC publishing a Mature Readers SWAMP THING book while simultaneously selling him as a kids’ toy line--
-- that was a strange decision. Maybe this led to the later rule that Vertigo characters can’t appear in all-ages material?
SWAMP THING #77 - Guest writer, Jamie Delano.
I’m sure this issue had some significance to SWAMP THING readers, but placing it in a HELLBLAZER trade was questionable.
Abby’s upset with Swamp Thing, gets drunk with the no-longer-possessed Constantine, spends a supposedly platonic night with him -- and all is well in the morning. In the meantime, Swamp Thing is moody, and Delano has a few more American caricatures to play with.
Not a great closing story for the trade. It’s hard to complain considering the amount of material you’re getting, though.
I'm not clutching pearls here, just an observation -- the idea that even women who hate Constantine end up in bed with him has maybe just a smidgen of misogyny. I fully support jerks as protagonists, but rewarding them for the behavior comes across as obnoxious.
The final page advises you to pick up the Peter Milligan HELLBLAZER trades, “From the writer of RED LANTERNS”.
I just realized that HELLBLAZER is a play on “trailblazer.” Congratulations, ‘80s cool kids, you fell for a pun.
Monday, November 30, 2015
Turtle Power - The Definitive (?) History of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
Paramount has posted the Turtle Power documentary for free on its YouTube page. The focus is mainly on the early days of the comic and the initial effort to franchise the characters in the late 1980s. Two things I was shocked to discover -- sitcom "legend" Chuck Lorre was the writer initially approached about developing the animated series, before he passed the job on to David Wise. I knew Lorre wrote the theme song, but had no idea he might've written the actual series.
I was also stunned to learn Michael Ian Block and Robert Ben Garant of MTV's The State played Raphael and Michelangelo (?) in that horrific TMNT live rock show. I wonder if they were the actors playing the parts on their Oprah appearance?
It's a fun doc, and worth your time if you have fond memories of the Turtles.
Now, for an opposing view...
I was also stunned to learn Michael Ian Block and Robert Ben Garant of MTV's The State played Raphael and Michelangelo (?) in that horrific TMNT live rock show. I wonder if they were the actors playing the parts on their Oprah appearance?
It's a fun doc, and worth your time if you have fond memories of the Turtles.
Now, for an opposing view...
Friday, November 6, 2015
"Now, Sentinel -- You will be De-Feeted!"
One thing I’ve rediscovered when going through old issues of Wizard is just how successful the X-Men toyline was in the 1990s. I’m assuming it was a massive success, because how else could you justify virtually any character to ever cameo in an X-book receiving his or her own action figure? Kids had to be desperate for more X-toys if they were buying Slayback figures, right?
The X-Men toy commercials, though -- who even remembers those? Looking on Youtube, every Masters of the Universe, Super Powers, G. I. Joe, and Transformers toy commercial seems to have been lovingly archived.
X-Men toy commercials are there, but I don’t sense any enthusiasm around them. Is this true for all toy commercials of this era; is it just accepted as fact that ‘80s toy commercials are superior to ones made in the ‘90s? Did the FCC impose some strict regulation on toy commercials that just made them dull after the ‘80s? Or were toy companies no longer willing to pay for higher-quality animation to use in these spots? Also, given the money flying around the industry at this time, I now wonder why Marvel didn’t produce high-quality animated ads for X-Men comics, like the ones Hasbro bankrolled years earlier for G. I. Joe.
Two commercials I do distinctly remember from the early ‘90s:
The commercial for the X-Men Sega Genesis game.
And the commercial for the second edition of the Marvel Universe trading cards.
(This is where I would've posted the commercial, but I can't find it online. Anyone up for finding this one? It aired during the summer of 1991 fairly regularly.)
Which is another memory triggered by old Wizards -- trading cards were a phenomenon during this era. Yet, no one produced any first-rate animated ads for Marvel or DC cards, either. The ‘80s really were the Golden Age of selling kids stuff, weren’t they?
Wednesday, November 4, 2015
Micro-Reviews: HELLBLAZER, Part Two
HELLBLAZER #4. My favorite cover, so far.
Delano’s referencing tensions between UK citizens & Middle Eastern (or “Asian”) immigrants back in 1988.
So this was the comics debut of Zed? They certainly gave her a makeover for the show. And Americanized her, not surprisingly.
I vaguely recall this child bride plot from the show. The episode removed any reference to American fundamentalists, I believe.
Actually, I have no idea how much of the 80s fundamentalist movement made its way to the UK. Don’t know if it was uniquely American.
Delano seems to think 80s pyramid schemes were run by Christian fundamentalists, but I’ve never heard that one before.
Wonder if he’s just lumping it all under the category of “’MERICA!”
HELLBLAZER #5 - The inevitable 1980s Vietnam piece.
Okay, DC’s copyright reads 1988, but Delano consistently sets stories in 1987. Is there a significance to this?
Constantine arrives in America. I wonder if he’s going to lecture us on what backwards rubes we are.
“Oi! Why don’t you wankers put down yer guns an’ Bibles an’ pick up a pint, yeh?”
The fundamentalist group from the last issue has accidentally summoned the spirit of MIA Vietnam soldiers -- awakening them inside their hometown in Iowa. Not a bad idea for a story.
There is the occasional glimpse of real people inside this town; they live with guilt and loss & can’t cope with the pain.
It’s just disappointing that Delano is doing what every “controversial” 80s Vietnam piece does.
Small town boys turned into monsters. Soldiers as murderous, rapist goons.
Disagreement with the war expressed with simpleminded caricatures of the people drafted into fighting it.
I think an extremely sanitized version of this plot made its way into the TV show.
It’s hard for me to remember, since I usually forgot each episode as soon as it aired.
HELLBLAZER #6 - The anti-skinhead issue.
John casually decides to stop a gaybashing this issue, reasoning that his pal Ray might be the target.
Although, in fairness, John rarely seems in a hurry to do anything in this series so far.
My memory is that Zed and John had a chaste relationship on the show.
In the comic, they immediately hook up and give us what might be DC’s first on-panel sex scene.
We learn that John’s gay friend Ray has AIDS this issue. His teashop has been closed down due to the threats.
I think AIDS was often the vehicle used to introduce gay characters back in the 80s. Ray might be the first in comics.
This is also the most British issue yet. Skinheads, footballers, slang for various ethnicities I’ve never heard before…
Delano’s referencing tensions between UK citizens & Middle Eastern (or “Asian”) immigrants back in 1988.
So this was the comics debut of Zed? They certainly gave her a makeover for the show. And Americanized her, not surprisingly.
I vaguely recall this child bride plot from the show. The episode removed any reference to American fundamentalists, I believe.
Actually, I have no idea how much of the 80s fundamentalist movement made its way to the UK. Don’t know if it was uniquely American.
Delano seems to think 80s pyramid schemes were run by Christian fundamentalists, but I’ve never heard that one before.
Wonder if he’s just lumping it all under the category of “’MERICA!”
HELLBLAZER #5 - The inevitable 1980s Vietnam piece.
Okay, DC’s copyright reads 1988, but Delano consistently sets stories in 1987. Is there a significance to this?
Constantine arrives in America. I wonder if he’s going to lecture us on what backwards rubes we are.
“Oi! Why don’t you wankers put down yer guns an’ Bibles an’ pick up a pint, yeh?”
The fundamentalist group from the last issue has accidentally summoned the spirit of MIA Vietnam soldiers -- awakening them inside their hometown in Iowa. Not a bad idea for a story.
There is the occasional glimpse of real people inside this town; they live with guilt and loss & can’t cope with the pain.
It’s just disappointing that Delano is doing what every “controversial” 80s Vietnam piece does.
Small town boys turned into monsters. Soldiers as murderous, rapist goons.
Disagreement with the war expressed with simpleminded caricatures of the people drafted into fighting it.
I think an extremely sanitized version of this plot made its way into the TV show.
It’s hard for me to remember, since I usually forgot each episode as soon as it aired.
HELLBLAZER #6 - The anti-skinhead issue.
John casually decides to stop a gaybashing this issue, reasoning that his pal Ray might be the target.
Although, in fairness, John rarely seems in a hurry to do anything in this series so far.
My memory is that Zed and John had a chaste relationship on the show.
In the comic, they immediately hook up and give us what might be DC’s first on-panel sex scene.
We learn that John’s gay friend Ray has AIDS this issue. His teashop has been closed down due to the threats.
I think AIDS was often the vehicle used to introduce gay characters back in the 80s. Ray might be the first in comics.
This is also the most British issue yet. Skinheads, footballers, slang for various ethnicities I’ve never heard before…
Monday, November 2, 2015
The Guide to the Guide to Comics Begins
My initial entry in the Comics Should Be Good blog on CBR was posted today. The Guide to the Guide to Comics is my regular feature that examines the early years of Wizard, which should at the very least be interesting. Perhaps not "Spawn rubbing worms all over his face" interesting, but still worth reading, I hope.
Check it out here: http://goodcomics.comicbookresources.com/2015/11/02/the-guide-to-the-guide-to-comics/
Check it out here: http://goodcomics.comicbookresources.com/2015/11/02/the-guide-to-the-guide-to-comics/
Thursday, October 29, 2015
Micro-Reviews: CAPTAIN AMERICA
More for the archive...my brief thoughts on the Society of Serpents trade, which reprints the brief Mike Carlin run and the earliest issues by Mark Gruenwald.
Has anyone ever given any real consideration of Mike Carlin, the writer, before?
Everyone knows where Denny O’Neil stands as a writer, but as the other guy who helped shape DC in the ‘90s, Carlin is largely a mystery.
Actually, Carlin only wrote CAP for a few issues when Marvel had no idea what to do w/the book. THING is his only real run as a writer, I think.
CAPTAIN AMERICA #303 - I like the way Machete uses the UPC box as a prop.
Carlin, CAP’s asst. editor, stepped in to replace DeMatteis, following his disagreement with Shooter re: Cap retiring.
Carlin has Cap give lip service to the idea that he fights for the American Dream, even though he can never have it, yet…
…Cap has a pretty normal life at this point. A fiancée, a job, an apartment -- he’s not doing so bad.
Gruenwald’s the one who takes the idea of Cap sacrificing his own happiness for the sake of The Dream and runs with it.
The Epic trade reprints Gruenwald’s editorial from Carlin’s last issue. Carlin’s moving to THING while editor Gru will become CAP’s writer.
While Carlin’s run is pretty generic superhero material, Gru lays out his take from the beginning: Cap’s devotion to freedom forces him to live a specific lifestyle--
--one that isn’t going to allow him the standard civilian life of a Marvel hero. That’s tricky to pull off & it might be one reason why fans turns against Gru’s run towards the end.
I’m a few issues into the early days of Gruenwald’s CAPTAIN AMERICA. 3 issues in & Cap’s already ditched his job & his sidekick.
Honestly, does Cap really think drawing a toothpaste ad is contributing to a “consumer-oriented” society that “places more value on possessions than people”?
Gru had a tendency to take sudden and somewhat arbitrary moral stands in the book. Cap feeling uncomfortable with drawing advertising work--
--reminds me of Gru’s later stance that the Super-Soldier Serum was just like a steroid & that Cap should abandon it.
Gru, to his credit, recanted that one after fans basically told him he was being ridiculous.
CAPTAIN AMERICA #311. So this is where “Steve Rogers draws Cap’s comic” comes from. Assumed it was from Silver Age.
Gru has the MU version of Mike Carlin acknowledge that CAP’s sales are slumping and it’s close to cancellation. He wasn’t joking!
CAP’s impending cancellation was the inspiration for Gru’s upcoming “Captain America No More!” arc, which blew up the book’s status quo.
Tuesday, October 27, 2015
Micro-Reviews: HELLBLAZER
I've been asked to archive my micro-reviews on this site, so I thought I'd give it a try for a few posts.
I don’t think I’ve ever read a HELLBLAZER comic before. Thought this might prove interesting:
…or not. The first issue has a strong opening, but John’s subsequent investigation becomes fairly dull as the story progresses.
And the mystery drags on to the second issue, unfortunately.
I’ll stick with it, though. I admire DC for releasing these thick, low-price trades. The value for the dollar really is amazing.
Also, can you believe that’s a Jim Lee cover? Didn’t recognize him at all.
HELLBLAZER #2, the most hardcore, cutting edge DC title of 1988. Because Alan Moore doesn’t work here anymore.
The story does pick up as it reaches its conclusion. I can see why the book developed a cult following early on -- a book about hard choices and unhappy endings is rare in any era, but was almost unheard of in ‘88.
The idea of John screwing over his friends in pursuit of greater goals became the hook of the TV show -- which is fine in theory, but I don’t think the show ever amounted to much.
I thought the pilot was great, but the show quickly fell into formula. I was bored by most episodes.
HELLBLAZER #3, set on Britain’s election day, 1987.
Goodness, can you guess the political stand that’s going to be taken? A rousing defense of free markets, I’m sure.
I wonder if every issue of Delano’s run touches on 80s UK drug culture. On-panel coke snorting this issue.
Guacamole, compact discs, and running shoes are cited as extravagant excesses of the rich.
How would 80s Delano respond if he knew most of the world’s poorest citizens today own cellphones?
That global communication would be instantaneous, effortless, and nearly free?
That the poor in UK & US have access to tech undreamed of by the rich just 20 years ago?
It’s an entire issue of Delano literally demonizing people he disagrees with. No different than any talk radio hack.
Monday, October 12, 2015
The End. For Now. Maybe.
After far too many years of doing this, I’ve decided that my days of regular updates are over. I don’t want to say that this is my final post, since it’s possible I’ll want to use this space again for other purposes, but I’m fairly confident that my days of regular updates are over.
I started this blog in 2007, when the easiest shorthand reference for a bad comic remained ’90s Marvel, or more specifically, ’90s X-books. The people working in comics didn’t seem to disagree. Today, you can buy actual $100 hardcover reprints of Rob Liefeld X-Force comics. Lord help us, Avengers: The Crossing is even available in hardcover. ’90s storylines routinely receive sequels these days. Bishop, Blink, and Deadpool have appeared in multi-million dollar movies. There are working professionals in the entertainment industry that weren’t even born when Todd McFarlane’s Spider-Man #1 blessed us with its multi-cover glory. And the blogging boom that inspired me to create an alternate site to explore the ’90s is long dead.
I’d like to thank anyone who ever posted a link or left a comment during the past eight years. Mike Sterling was the first to post a link during my initial week of blogging, giving me more readers early on than I probably deserved, so special thanks to him. I’d also like to thank folks like wwk5d and Matt for leaving comments here for as long as I can remember. And wherever you are Fnord Serious and cyke68, I hope you’re doing well.
I’m still around. You can follow me on Twitter if you’d like, and I’m open to writing for someone else’s site if the project’s right. You can email me through the Contact page. (Actually, I have an idea for another review series if anyone’s interested. Also, I’ll be doing more micro-reviews on Twitter in the future.) Feel free to contact me. Thanks for the support, and may all your web-lines be advantageous.
Friday, October 9, 2015
ADVENTURES OF THE X-MEN #12 - March 1997
Better to Light a Small Candle…
Credits: Ralph Macchio (writer), Yancey Labat (penciler), Ralph Cabrera (inks), Paul Becton w/World Color (colors), Ul Higgins (letters)
Summary: Lilandra summons the X-Men to her vessel, in the hopes that the Phoenix Force will again possess Jean Grey and protect the M’Kraan Crystal. Phoenix returns, and Gladiator travels with the X-Men to the Crystal’s homeworld. Inside the Crystal, the Dweller in Darkness has placed the N’Garai and a resurrected D’Ken as foils for the X-Men. His plan is to destroy the Crystal and feed on the fear of every living thing as existence perishes. The X-Men defeat his thralls and merge their spirits with the Phoenix. Phoenix sends a message to the universe, uniting all beings in brotherhood and harmony. The M’Kraan Crystal then shatters, destroying existence as we know it. With no fear to feed upon, the Dweller in Darkness is left vulnerable to his former lackey D’Spayre. The Living Tribunal watches as explorer Galen agrees to join with the dying universe to become a new entity. Life begins anew, and billions of years later, the X-Men are formed in Westchester County.
Continuity Notes:
- Every “official” X-Man from the cartoon, i.e. those in the opening credits, is featured this issue.
- The message Man-Thing left to Jean last issue gives her the inspiration to spread hope to the universe, spoiling the Dweller in Darkness’ scheme.
- The explorer Galen later becomes Galactus in the mainstream Marvel Universe. I think Macchio is saying that the Adventures reality doesn’t have a Galactus until it’s destroyed this issue, since the issue opens with Galen exploring the death of the universe.
- The Phoenix reemerges in a red costume, which would seem to be a major coloring mistake.
How Did This Get Published?: “Come heah to mama, fellers. Time fer a little clean-up!” Mercifully, this is one of the few times Macchio’s given Rogue dialogue in this series.
Miscellaneous Note: The full expression that inspired the title of this story is “It's better to light a small candle than curse the darkness.” It appears to be attributed to Eleanor Roosevelt.
Review: Yes, that’s the proper response to your series getting cancelled -- just blow up the entire universe. On some level, it’s hard not to admire what Macchio’s going for this issue, taking advantage of the fact that the series is outside of continuity and, let’s face it, off in a corner that no one is paying attention to. In twenty-two pages, he’s crafted a very literal interpretation of what “the last” X-Men story should be, and it doesn’t involve a flash-forward to the next generation of the team or an epic final battle between the X-Men and Magneto. It’s the death of everything, but that’s okay, because after a few billion years, life begins anew and eventually Charles Xavier is back again with his original team of X-Men, reenacting the opening page of 1963’s X-Men #1. It’s all done by rote with very little sentiment, but there is one moment towards the end that’s honestly touching. As the universe draws to a close, Xavier’s dream of peace and unity is finally achieved when the X-Men reach into the hearts of every sentient being in the universe and impart solidarity in the face of death. The universe dies nobly, rejecting fear and finally united as one. In a strange way, it actually is the ultimate ending of the X-Men’s story. The issue remains a bit of a mess, and surely any kid picking this up to get more of what he loved from the cartoon is going to be either bored or terrified, but there is a germ of a great idea in here.
Wednesday, October 7, 2015
ADVENTURES OF THE X-MEN #11 - February 1997
Tower of Despair
Credits: Ralph Macchio (writer), Yancey Labat (penciler), Ralph Cabrera (inks), Paul Becton w/World Color (colors), Michael Higgins (letters)
Summary: The Vanisher’s attempt to send the X-Men back to Earth doesn’t go as planned, with Cyclops and Gambit arriving in New York but Storm and Jean Grey materializing in a Florida swamp. Inside the swamp, the duo discovers Man-Thing, a creature with a strange affinity for Jean Grey. Going into town, they encounter the charismatic Godfrey Silverton, who leads the townspeople to a tower where he claims their dreams will be fulfilled. Silverton then reveals himself as D’Spayre, and Jean quickly realizes that the tower is connected to the Nexus of Realities. Storm destroys the tower while Jean faces D’Spayre in the Astral Plane. Jean discovers he’s working for the Dweller in Darkness, and with Man-Thing’s help, forces D’Spayre to retreat. At the mansion, Lilandra contacts Xavier, revealing that the M’Kraan Crystal is unstable and getting worse following the battle at the Nexus of Realities.
Continuity Notes:
- Man-Thing and D’Spayre debut in the Adventures continuity.
- The Dweller in Darkness was last mentioned in Adventures of the X-Men #4.
- Man-Thing subconsciously passes along a secret to Jean that she feels is “the most important thing” she’ll ever remember.
Miscellaneous Note: This issue and the next feature an episode guide of the animated series, written by Andy Mangels.
“Um, Actually…”: The script leaves the “All” out of “Nexus of All Realities.” Also, the story claims at one point that the tower actually is the Nexus, which doesn’t sound right.
Review: Adventures of the X-Men is one issue away from cancellation, and it looks as if Ralph Macchio is tying together various stories from previous issues and going for a cosmic sendoff. Even though the word “Adventures” became synonymous with “done-in-one, continuity-free” storytelling in the ‘90s, an accurate adaptation of the X-Men animated series actually would feature continued storylines, so I’m okay with Macchio going in this direction for the final issues. Yancey Labat returns as artist, in this title that has yet to find anyone willing to stick around for more than a few issues. Unlike the previous pencilers, there’s no pretense that Labat is drawing in the conventional “Adventures” style, which means his work looks like almost any other comic Marvel published circa 1996. On a few pages he manages to channel early Terry Dodson fairly well, but much of the issue is plagued by disappearing backgrounds and cluttered storytelling.
I guess even the Adventures books couldn’t avoid Marvel’s Bronze Age Revival in the mid-‘90s, which is the only justification I can come up with for dedicating this issue to the Man-Thing, D’Spayre, and the Nexus of (All) Realities. I’m not carrying any ‘70s nostalgia into this comic with me, so much like the revivals of Shang-Chi and the Micronauts, I just kind of shrug my shoulders and move on. There’s nothing terrible about the script, aside from a few lines of clunky dialogue, but it’s hard to find a reason to care about Storm and Jean getting dropped into a tame recreation of an old Steve Gerber comic. The prospect of the Nexus of Realities having an impact on the M’Kraan Crystal actually isn’t a bad idea, however, so maybe there will be a smooth transition into next issue’s finale.
Monday, October 5, 2015
ADVENTURES OF THE X-MEN #10 - January 1997
Media Darlings
Credits: Ralph Macchio (writer), Yancey Labat (penciler), Ralph Cabera (inks), Paul Becton w/Graphic Colorworks (colors), Michael Higgins (letters)
Summary: Storm films a pilot episode for Mojo, but the filming is interrupted by aspiring screenwriter Vroot. Meanwhile, the Vanisher teleports the X-Men to the Mojoverse. They quickly encounter Longshot, who is leading a rebellion against Mojo. With his help, the Vanisher discovers Storm’s location. The X-Men free her from Mojo’s guards and soon confront Mojo, who’s building a tower to reach Earth’s satellite transmissions. Mojo’s device doesn’t work, thanks to Vroot, who’s been secretly working with the rebellion. His plan is foiled, but Mojo demands Storm honor her contract. The Vanisher volunteers to take her place; he needs to hide from Sebastian Shaw, and he’s always wanted to be an actor anyway. Mojo agrees and Vanisher sends the X-Men home.
Continuity Notes:
- Cyclops’ headgear is drawn incorrectly the entire issue. The area above his visor shouldn’t be covered.
- In this continuity, the Vanisher is a former employee of Sebastian Shaw’s. His motivation for double-crossing him last issue is clarified, somewhat, in the second chapter. Vanisher claims that he wants payback for undisclosed things Shaw did to him while under his employ.
I Love the ‘90s: Vroot’s pitch to Mojo for a new series: “We start off with a young twenty-ish C.E.O. -- already we nailed the Generation Xers! He’s a shallow little cretin who says ‘way cool’ ‘til even his mother wants to strangle him! Now we caught the Grunge audience -- and the seniors!”
“Huh?” Moment: Not only do Longshot’s luck powers enable him to automatically know where Storm’s being held captive, but simply holding hands with the Vanisher enables him to subconsciously pass the information along.
Review: Well, the Mojo scenes aren’t funny and the TV parodies are tedious and years out-of-date. I’m stunned. I will say that Macchio has a better handle on Storm than I would’ve guessed, with only a few ridiculous lines that no human would ever speak (“I despise what I have been forced to become!”) And thankfully, Macchio seems to be tired of media parodies by the time the X-Men arrive, so the second half of the issue is a fairly standard rescue mission and not a play on Bewitched or something. Even the obnoxious Vroot is given some justification for existing in the final act, although it’s hard to excuse how much of a nuisance he’s been so far.
Probably the most painful moment of the issue is when Longshot is thrown into the plot, since there’s apparently some law that says he must appear in every Mojo story. Macchio demonstrates yet again that he’s a little fuzzy on how these X-Men’s powers work, so the reader is left with a torturous scene that has Longshot suddenly developing telepathic abilities. You know who does have telepathic powers and is standing right next to Longshot? Her name is Jean Grey and she has absolutely nothing to do in this story, so perhaps this moment should’ve gone to her. Just a suggestion. Still, it’s not a terrible issue, and I have to give Macchio credit for using the Vanisher creatively throughout the storyline. Considering how badly a Mojoverse story can go off the rails, this is surprisingly tolerable.